Today marks six weeks since surgery. I've only been taking pictures weekly now so I don't make myself crazy analyzing my face, as changes are most noticeable week to week at this point. The right side of my face and chin still have considerable numbness. Its odd - I have "sensation," but its not the same as having the feeling back. Hard to explain. The roof of my mouth around the border of the upper teeth is still numb, but the rest finally has feeling again. The only way I can really explain how my face feels is: if you've ever been outside in the extreme cold/snow and gotten a really cold nose and cheeks and fingers and then gone inside where its warm. There's this transition when you're "dethawing" that almost feels like your skin is burning and your fingers and face feel tight with blood flowing to them. Well my face feels like its on the verge of dethawing ... but it just never does! I also feel like its tender and sore (not bad, but I hadn't noticed it before.) If I even slightly bump my nose or cheeks it hurts as if it was bruised. I'm not really sure if that is only my brain registering it as pain because I'm still numb or if it really is pain. Its all very strange. My lips are moving much more normally when I talk now. I've stopped telling people the second I open my mouth that I've had jaw surgery (it was compulsive because of how awkward I feel.) I've realized that most people can't tell anything is different until I point it out in detail. I'm very aware of every change of course, but I'm relieved to know that others don't notice much at all. I had one full week back at work and then Thanksgiving week, which was short and I feel much better this week being around everyone. I'm even eating in the cafeteria instead of in my office. I feel like this week was a breakthrough in the recovery in that I feel like (because mostly people don't notice anymore) that I can transition back into society. I'm going back to church and I went to the Celine Dion concert on Tuesday and we decorated our Christmas tree last night. I'm not hiding out at home anymore - I feel like I can sit back and take my time with recovery now that I'm past the stressful stage of explaining myself to everyone. I still have moments where I feel anxious to be ALL healed, but I'm always reminded how blessed I am to have had an amazing doctor and amazing friends and was told that I'm "ahead of the curve" in healing. Patience, patience, patience. I had been going back weekly for check ups, but now its every 2 weeks. I'm supposed to have 3 fingers ROM by December 10! I feel like it was such a victory to get 2 the other day. I don't even work on it as much as I'm supposed to. I'm wearing 2 rubber bands at night and for a few hours during the day - no problem! Oh, and I only have a slight bruise left under one eye that is easy to cover with makeup. I can't believe how fast it seems the recovery went, but I vividly remember that it did not feel "fast" the first few weeks. I'm actually still feeling up and down emotionally and hoping that will also get better ... not sure what that's all about. But overall I really am SO HAPPY with the results. My teeth make contact in places I've never felt and I no longer have any space where there used to be an open bite. The most dramatic facial difference is in my profile - such an improvement. I hope everyone is enjoying the holidays!!!
